Tuesday, August 31, 2004

high court news flash

in a stunning demonstration that the race to the bottom is far from over, the online hon. sandra day o'connor bobblehead has made its debut. (also featured on the site are the annotated j. stevens and c.j. rehnquist bobbleheads, plus various and sundry other entertainments)

i find it particularly entertaining that bobblesandra is neither nodding nor shaking her head, but giving a typically middle-of-the-road balancing head-fake.

...in related news, the rehnquist bobblehead has sold for $374.90 on ebay.


Thursday, August 26, 2004

a thousand apologies for the recent lapse in posting... i myself was on vacation, and had no access to either the internet or telephone service (aside from payphones, i suppose, but they don't really count, because i've completely forgotten how to use them--do you dial a 1? the area code? what about 900 numbers? can i use those from a payphone?). to my knowledge, bangers has been on a golf course for the better part of august, and remains there still (certainly a better way to occupy one's time than, say, working for free). as for the others, i'll let them speak for themselves.

regardless, it's back to school now, and all the innocent, optimistic 1Ls have arrived on campus. there was this lovely little picnic in the courtyard today (no beer, btw--bad form, that), where we, the mature and oh-so-knowledgable 2Ls, were supposed to impart some wisdom and confidence to our successors.

being pathologically anti-social myself, i didn't do a whole lot of that, and instead spent my time griping about having to pay the piper and start work for the journal (sorry, pork rind... i must admit being one of those people, who can't seem to divorce their workload from how they value themselves as a person), remembering how wonderful it was to be on vacation, and eating the free food.

but here's some words of wisdom for the fresh-faced (and not-so-fresh faced, too... certainly wouldn't want to discriminate) 1Ls in the audience: glannon is your friend in civ pro. buy "law school confidential." drink heavily. avoid hooking up with a member of the faculty until at least 2L. and mute your damn computer before you start IM'ing in class.

oh, and welcome to law school--the best (or worst, or not) three years of your life.


Thursday, August 12, 2004

y'know, i'm beginning to think that this whole on-campus bidding process is actually one of the screening filters used by firms. if we're stubborn enough to slog through the mountains of bad data, reams of contradictory rankings, and cacophony of ad nauseam gossip, then we've proven we can handle the slow-set cement that is american law.

...of course, it could work the opposite way: anybody dumb enough to spend days poring over statistics and rumor (and then giving evidentiary weight to same) is obviously unfit for anything beyond burger flipping, and/or committment to the psych ward.

at this point, a nice, snug straitjacket does sound rather appealing.


Tuesday, August 10, 2004

were it not for the graphic savagery of the crime, the florida xbox sextuple-homicide would be funny. apparently, authorities still haven't managed to identify one of the victims, even dental records being useless. oh, and the probation officer charged with keeping the leader of the group (and owner of the xbox) under surveillance has been fired. glad to see the florida executive branch is still operating at peak efficiency.

i'll tell you one thing: this is not the reason i went to law school. even giving this guy and his accomplices the benefit of a trial rasies all sorts of moral issues, by putting them on the same level as the state. (though, i suppose that's ok, since law is only tertiarily concerned with morality...)

then again, maybe they can argue they weren't acting voluntarily...


Tuesday, August 03, 2004

so this whole recruting thing is beginning to wear me out. this is problematic, as bidding hasn't even started yet, and i'm only about a hour into my "research" (read: procrastination). can someone explain to me how exactly i'm supposed to divine the true nature of each one of 200 different firms from the shallow platitudes and bland superlatives they put on their websites? oh, and someone please explain to me why all the firms that score well with associates are those outside new york. (ok, so there's ONE nyc firm in the top ten--effectively de minimis--and they probably cooked their survey stats to get there anyway.)

am i foolish for thinking there's some analytical method whereby i can find the perfect firm (or, hell, even a set of five!) for me? i want balance, damnit. i want 70-80 hours a week, and a big pile of cash. i don't need a mountain of cash. and i want my weekends, but i can do without beauty sleep for most of the week. perhaps there's some truth to the idea that too many choices equals paralytic indecision. perhaps we'd be better off if this were like consulting or investment banking, where there are really only three or four options.

...oh, who am i kidding. there's only one metric i really care about...